Ten Ways to Make Someone Happy (including yourself)

What is the secret to true happiness? Have you ever thought about that? What is it about some people that make them so darned happy? How can some people can be happy despite the trials and tribulations of life? Conversely, why is it that some people are never happy?

 

For me, the secret of being happy lies not in me but in others. I think to be truly happy you have to look outward.  You have to make others happy. I hope that I do that through my writing and I also try to do that in my daily life. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely have plenty of days when I struggle to be happy. Sometimes the stresses of my life really get me down and I find it difficult to “put on a happy face”. But on those days, I find that if I do just the simplest act of kindness, my mood starts to lift upward.

 

The story below comes from a website called Propel Steps. I’m not sure of the original author but it really echoes what I truly feel - that our own happiness lies in making others happy.

 

Once a group of 50 people was attending a seminar. Suddenly the speaker stopped and started giving each one a balloon. Each one was asked to write his/her name on it using a marker pen. Then all the balloons were collected and put in another room.

 

Now these delegates were left in that room and asked to find the balloon which had their name written, within 5 minutes. Everyone was frantically searching for their name, colliding with each other, pushing around others and there was utter chaos. At the end of 5 minutes no one could find their own balloon.

 

Now each one was asked to randomly collect a balloon and give it to the person whose name was written on it. Within minutes everyone had their own balloon.

 

The speaker began— Exactly this is happening in our lives. Everyone is frantically looking for happiness all around, not knowing where it is.Our happiness lies in the happiness of other people. Give them their happiness; you will get your own happiness.

   

I’ve listed a few of my favorite ideas for spreading happiness and making others smile.

 

1.    Smile at everyone you pass. Smiling is euphoric. Go ahead, smile. You feel good when you do. Smiling is not only euphoric, it’s contagious. When you smile at someone, it’s really hard for them not to smile back. Maybe the person you smiled at was having a bad day. Maybe your smile helped to turn that day around. Perhaps that person then smiled at someone else and made their day. You can see where this is going.

2.   Let someone in front of you in traffic. This is a hard one for me. I really get irritated at those people who seemingly do not know how to merge. But, you never know who might be behind the wheel. Maybe it is a new teen driver, getting on the interstate for the first time. Or maybe it’s a timid elderly woman who doesn’t normally drive herself. Perhaps it’s a really aggressive driver who would have cut you off if you didn’t let them in. Just slow down, let them in, and smile because you did.

3.    When you’re at the mall or entering an office building, stop and hold the door for the person coming in behind you, even if they are several steps behind you. Hopefully they will smile at your gesture of kindness and thank you. If not, wish them a happy day anyway.

4.    Greet every person who steps in the elevator with you. Wish them all a great day as you leave.

5.    Take the time to learn someone’s name and remember it the next time you see them. Have a favorite server at the coffee shop or cashier at the market? Notice their nametag and call them by name. Jot it down so you can remember it next time you see them and greet them by name. I use the Notes app on my phone for this.

6.    Make conversation with your favorite server, cashier, clerk at the dry cleaners, etc. Learn something about them. Did they just have a baby? Are they planning a vacation? Ask them about it the next time you see them. (After you call them by name - see #5 above)

7.       Be a really good friend. Know someone who is going through a tough time? Spend some time with them. Ask them how they’re doing and really listen. Don’t go on about your problems, listen to theirs. Give them a hug, let them know you care. Even if they don’t feel like talking, sit with them in silence. Just be there.

8.    Send someone a handwritten thank you note. I always keep a stash of note cards handy. You can get some really cute ones in the dollar bins at a certain craft store. Whenever someone has done something nice for me or for my family I try to write them a note letting them know how much I appreciated it. I was taught as a child to always write thank you notes and I really think it is a lost art. Let’s bring them back!

9.    Buy a bouquet of flowers at the grocery store and pass out individual flowers to people who might need a day brightener – the exhausted mom with the screaming toddler, the frazzled cashier who just encountered a grumpy customer. I haven’t tried this one yet but I just thought of it as I was writing these. And it made me smile!

10.  Jot down your own ideas to be kind and make others smile. As was the case in # 9 above, just doing so makes you happy.

So today, I encourage you to go out and make someone happy. You’ll be happy you did!

 

"I began learning long ago that those who are happiest are those who do the most for others" – Booker T. Washington

It should be every day!

So, my original goal of one charity a month was a bit lofty. What was I thinking? I am a mother of a special needs child. I have a full time job, a husband, two other children and a home to care for. In a nutshell, I’m human and I have a life that frequently takes over. So, as evidenced by my lack of blog posts, I haven't quite "Done Anything"! I am excited to say though, that I have scheduled a date to cook and serve a meal at our local Ronald McDonald House and I’m thrilled about that. I’m working on getting my team of volunteers together and I’m planning my meal and grocery list. I will write more on that as the time nears. But in the meantime, just thought I’d share my thoughts on Valentine’s Day.

Today is Valentine’s Day. Whoopee, big deal! To me it is really just another day. Now don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy the abundance of chocolates and other treats that tend to surface around the office on this day. But to me, Valentine’s Day is just like every other day in my life. I wake up and tell my husband I love him. I get my daughter ready for school, give her plenty of hugs and kisses and tell her I love her. I leave for work, kiss my husband and tell him I love him. I’ll talk to my two older kids sometime during the day and I’ll tell them I love them. Then, later tonight, I will kiss my husband again and tell him I love him before we go to sleep. You get the point and I’m sure you’ve heard this before. You don’t need a special day to tell the people around you that you love them. You should do that every day! And I’m sure we all do that. But what about the other gifts that are exchanged on Valentine’s day? Those also can (and should) be given any day throughout the year. Imagine how tickled your wife would be if she received flowers at work on any random day. I’ve been with my husband for 17 years and I think I have gotten flowers maybe 10 times. Probably 8 of those times have been random. It really does feel great.

It’s also Random Acts of Kindness Week. I think it is great that there is a week to promote Random Acts of Kindness (RAK’s), but we all know that we should do these every day. Seriously, how hard is it to just smile or give a compliment to a passing stranger? I have been the recipient of a compliment from a stranger and it made my day. I was riding in the elevator at work one morning and a very well dressed man commented that he liked my dress. Now I guess some would find this creepy, but I did not. I beamed from ear to ear and thanked him. Then you know what I did? I did what we should all do when we receive a RAK. I passed it on. I passed a woman in the hall and really loved the blouse she had on, so I told her. That one compliment really sparked something in me and I try to compliment people as frequently as possible. And my compliments are genuine. If I don’t like what someone is wearing, I’m not going to compliment them. But I will still give them a smile! Mother Teresa said it best, "We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do."

I guess my point in all of this rambling is that we should not reserve a special day or week or holiday to show love and kindness to other people. Send your mother flowers on August 3^rd, cook your husband his favorite dinner on a Wednesday, pack a love note in your kid’s lunchbox any day of the week. To keep this in theme with my blog, we should also remember that charities need our help all year long, not just during the holidays. There are always ample opportunities during Christmas. You can adopt a family, collect food for a food bank, and even go caroling at a nursing home. But the food bank needs food year round, the kids in the family grow and need new clothes, the elderly in the nursing home sure would love someone to just sit and visit with. I am really trying to keep this in mind throughout the year and I hope that you will do. Remember, “There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.” – John Andrew Holmes. So go out and do your heart some good!